Grand, I downloaded your book "Normal" yesterday, and I'm now at page 434. Clearly I've enjoyed it! You haven created a fun, easy to read story that has kept me entertained. I'm hesitant to offer any "criticism" (which I mean in a literary sense) to someone I don't know and who hasn't asked my opinion, and especially when there is so much I like. With that said I'll offer two things: 1) the resignation of the President happen really fast (small number of pages). That would be such a huge deal, and possibly set up the transfer of power to the main political antagonist, I would have enjoyed much more. I think you could have spent 2, 3, maybe 4 chapters on the politics,'events shaping that decision, etc. And maybe he doesn't resign? Especially knowing whomhe is leaving in charge? Possibly assassinated? 2) I really wanted to read the chapter where the second half of the "Islamic" gang was taken out by Thomas and Company. There was so much build up and then ..... we were left hanging! Again: a good read and I look forward to more!
You did read about it. That's the flashback scene in the prologue. I've started "Normal" and "Tales of the Ranch" both off with flashback scenes. And the other "Tales" I'm working on will start that way as well. And don't worry about offering the criticism. I put the stories out there for all and have no problems with folks telling me what they think, good or bad.
Final revised copy uploaded in the original post. Thanks to everyone who took or will take the time to read it.
Grand, thanks for the great stories, especially Second Chance. I have applied or membership at tb2k and s&pforums, no joy in either, perhaps because I use google, a bogus domain, for my email. I wish you would post them here or maybe on kindle, $$ are the best comments. Keep the price low, it becomes a no brainer.
I like the story. ''however, Chapter 7 now has dates before the end of Chapt 6 (5 and 6 July). The end of Chap 7 is 10 July, and chap 8 starts 19 Jul. On page 137, Sharon got some chicken from the freezer nd prepared it and rice for supper. No mention was made of a microwave (electic power hungry). Also at several other pages, Thomas gets meet from the freezer and prepares meals either for his family or the group.
Chapter 7 begins with the actual cast so to speak and Chapters 1-6 was the background scenes setting the stage for the story and follow up. As for the dates, just a skip over a week in the story line. Never mentioned a microwave...the freezer was being run by the batteries in the basement. I might have edited that part out as "details."
Thanks for the read. Read it a while back on a different board. Now that there is a PDF version I'll be reading it again.
Just finished Normal and enjoyed it imensely. Now I have to fine Tales of The Ranch again...I know I have seen it but don't seem to have a pdf in my awaiting reading folder...
Just downloaded the pdf again on new chromebook, read the story earlier and enjoyed it thoroughly, plus the other 4 as well, all great stories.
