Motivational Poster Thread (warning content)

A bloke goes to the council to apply for a job in the office.

The interviewer asks him,“Are you allergic to anything”

He replies, “Yes caffeine.”

“Have you ever worked for the public service before.”

“Yes I was in the army"he says,I was in Iraq for two tours.”

The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment.

Then he asks,“Are you disabled in any way”

The guy says “Yes,a mine exploded next to me when I was there and I lost both my testicles.” The interviewer grimaces and then says,"O.K.

You’ve got enough points for me to take you on right away.

Our normal hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm…but you can start tomorrow at 10.00am-and carry on starting at 10.00am everyday."

The bloke is puzzled and asks."If the work hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm ,why don’t you want me here until 10.00am…

I’m not looking for any special treatment y’know."

"What you have to understand is that this is a council job,"the

interviewer says, “For the first two hours,we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls.There’s no point coming in for that.”…

 

In my last year in the Navy, I'd gotten a bit "heavy", so they put me on a weight-reduction exercise program. Had me jogging with a group everyday. I wore a t-shirt I got at the Navy Exchange - Garfield the cartoon cat in shorts and running shoes, saying "take this jog and shove it!" The senior PO in charge gave me nasty looks.

 

I am a proud member of this august group, meeting each of the entry requirements.