Motivational Poster Thread (warning content)

Liberals would have been offended, protested, and all mankind would have been destroyed. Kind of like what is happening now.

 

If the snowflakes knew where it actually rests ,,, they'd be out stopping and pissing on the ground it rests in .

 

Joke Of The Week
January 4, 2022


From Jane Austen.

After 37 years of marriage, Jake dumped his wife, Edith, for his young secretary. His new trophy wife demanded that they live in Jake and Edith’s multi million dollar home, and since Jake’s lawyers were a little better, he prevailed.

He gave Edith just 3 days to move out. She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third and final day, she sat down for the last time at the beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When Edith had finished, she went into each and every room and stuffed half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollows of all of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When Jake returned with his new wife, all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly the house began to smell. They tried everything: cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which Jake and his new wife had to move out for several days. In the end, they even replaced the expensive wool carpeting, but nothing took away the awful smell. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairman refused to work in the house. The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

Edith called Jake and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, Jake agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. Edith agreed, and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, Jake and his new wife stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.

INCLUDING THE CURTAIN RODS.

Hell hath no fury….

 

I was 15 before we lived in a house with indoor plumbing so yes

 

With all my years in Ak with Unka Sugar, too often..

 

there is a patch for everything....

 

some medicine goes down easier...

 

the other stuff is for sissys.

 

The Marines are looking at a new combat sight for the M-4

 

I have that patch in yellow and have gotten a few chuckles because of it