These True Facts About Democratic Voters Will Shock You

Discussion in 'Politics' started by OldDude49, Jul 21, 2020.


  1. OldDude49

    OldDude49 Just n old guy

    interesting opinion piece and satire here...???

    Sometimes the truth is shocking and difficult to accept. Ali was viciously attacked for his expert analysis on Republican voters, yet his critics could not offer a single piece of scientific evidence to refute him. It was just the latest example of a growing threat to the personal safety of media pundits: being criticized by non-blue-check accounts on Twitter.

    The following facts about Democratic voters, for example, are shocking and difficult to accept. They will probably be challenged by unverified Twitter users and other non-experts. But that doesn't make them any less true.

    • Most Democratic voters in this country would rather watch their children be slowly dismembered by a trans woman of color than allow their children's lives to be saved by a Christian gun owner.
    • 85 percent of white Democrats who have publicly recommended White Fragility have not read the book; 100 percent of the ones who actually did read it would not have done so if they were unable to post about it on social media.
    • The vast majority of people who voted for Hillary Clinton in 2016 think it's "mostly true" that Jeffrey Epstein's financial support for Democratic causes cancels out all of his crimes.
    • Most Democratic voters are disappointed Barack Obama didn't turn out to be a secret Muslim and cite "the unlawful assassination of Osama bin Laden" as the biggest mistake of his presidency.
    • Most Democratic voters "strongly agree" that orchestrating a hate crime hoax is an effective way to combat bigotry in society.
    • Most Democratic voters would prefer to be murdered by an illegal immigrant and come back as a ghost to haunt the police who arrested their killer.
    • Two-thirds of white Democratic voters have Googled the phrase "Coexist bumper sticker without cross and Jew symbol." More than half have Googled "how to oppose affordable-housing development without being racist." About a third have Googled "how to make my son gay."
    • Every single Elizabeth Warren voter has at least one item in their household with the phrase, "It's Wine O'Clock, Bitches!" More than 75 percent of Pete Buttigieg voters have updated their wills to include a request that "High Hopes" be played at their funerals.

    These True Facts About Democratic Voters Will Shock You
     
    Ura-Ki, ditch witch and HK_User like this.
  2. Merkun

    Merkun furious dreamer

    Stiles is making assertions without crediting his sources. He might be right, but I'm guessing his "facts" are extractions from his butt. All the same, it's a mite provocative.
     
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  3. oil pan 4

    oil pan 4 Monkey+++

    Democrat voters picked a convicted child molester over an unremarkable republican in Virginia, that tells you all need to know.
     
    Ura-Ki likes this.
  4. OldDude49

    OldDude49 Just n old guy

    did I not post that this was an opinion piece with some satire?
     
    john316, Tully Mars, Ura-Ki and 3 others like this.
  5. nkawtg

    nkawtg Monkey+++

    "These True Facts About Democratic Voters Will Shock You"
    They'll eat a bowl of crap if it had the letter "D" assigned to it.
     
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  6. Merkun

    Merkun furious dreamer

    You did that, exactly. That changes what? Politics might not be the right place for satire, maybe? You could move it to the inferno or jokes and be a lot closer to the right place. Even the reading room might be more appropriate as original work.
     
    Last edited: Jul 21, 2020
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  7. SB21

    SB21 Monkey+++

    " Politics not the right place for satire " ?????
    As bad as our political situation is now ,, if you dont find a reason to laugh about it now ,,, then you're about to drive yourself freaking crazy ,,,
     
  8. DKR

    DKR Raconteur of the first stripe

    A lot of them live in the local graveyard?

    Many are illegal aliens?

    More hilarity to follow
     
    OldDude49, Ura-Ki and SB21 like this.
  9. Tully Mars

    Tully Mars Metal weldin' monkey

    Sgt.-Hulka.
     
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