> > > We were dressed and ready to go out for a dinner & theater evening. > > > We turned on a 'night light', turned the answering machine on, > > > covered our pet parrot and put the cat in the backyard. We phoned > > > the local taxi company and requested a cab. > > > > > > The taxi arrived, and we opened the front door to leave the house. > > > As we walked out the door, the cat we had put out in the yard > > > scooted back into the house. We didn't want the cat shut in the > > > house because she always tries to get at the parrot. My wife > > > walked on out to the taxi, while I went back inside to get the cat. > > > > > > The cat ran upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, > > > my wife didn't want the driver to know that the house would be > > > empty for the night, so she explained to the taxi driver that I > > > would be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good-by to my mother." > > > > > > A few minutes later, I got into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," I > > > said, as we drove away. "That stupid bitch was hiding under the > > > bed and I had to poke her ass with a coat hanger to get her to > > > come out. She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. > > > Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching > > > me. But it worked, so I hauled her downstairs and threw her out > > > into the backyard. She'd better not shit in the vegetable garden again!" > > > > > > The silence in the taxi was deafening