Motivational Poster Thread (warning content)

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Quigley_Sharps, Apr 22, 2008.


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  1. Cruisin Sloth

    Cruisin Sloth Special & Slow

    OK I can't find a one to Bash the D**Ks !!

    BUTT MM34 , you could be in luck !!!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    A businessman was about to go on a long business trip, and was worried that his wife would cheat on him while he was gone. So to prevent this, he visited the local sex shop in order to buy his wife a vibrator to keep her occupied in his absence.
    After examining the products, he hadn't found an appropriately amazing vibrator and asked the store clerk for help. The store clerk recommended the "Voodoo D**k."
    "How does it work?" asked the businessman.
    The clerk unwrapped the Voodoo D**k from its ceremonial tiki box and said to it, "Voodoo D**k that door." The vibrator flew out of the box and attacked the door with such vigor that the door split in half.
    "Fantastic," said the man. "I'll take it!"
    He instructed his wife on how to use the Voodoo D**k and left on his business trip. Soon, his wife decided to try it out and said the magic words: "Voodoo D**k my p***y."
    The Voodoo D**k flew out of the box and gave her orgasm after orgasm. But soon it became too much, and she couldn't figure out how to make it stop. So she got into her car and began driving to the hospital, swerving so much that she got pulled over by the police. The policeman asked her why she was driving so recklessly and she explained to him that she had a Voodoo D**k inside her that wouldn't leave her alone.
    The policeman looked at her skeptically and said, "Voodoo D**k, my ass."


    Picture withheld & cleaned with Bleach
     
    tbf8170, 3cyl, Gator 45/70 and 5 others like this.
  2. Cruisin Sloth

    Cruisin Sloth Special & Slow

    Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St. Peter at the pearly gates.
    St. Peter says "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I'm granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want".
    The first nun says, "I want to be Sophia Loren" and POOF she's gone.
    The second says, "I want to be Madonna" and POOF she's gone.
    The third says, "I want to be Sara Pipalini".
    St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says.
    "Sara Pipalini" replies the nun.
    St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I'm sorry, that name just doesn't ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. "No Sister, he laughs, this says 'Sahara Pipeline, laid by 500 men in 7 days'!"
     
  3. Clyde

    Clyde Jet Set Tourer Administrator Founding Member

    Yes.

     
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  4. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

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  5. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

    [​IMG]
     
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  6. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

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  7. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

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    Motomom34, Gator 45/70 and 3M-TA3 like this.
  8. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

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  9. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

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  10. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

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  11. 3M-TA3

    3M-TA3 Cold Wet Monkey

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  12. stg58

    stg58 Monkey+++ Founding Member

    More Mothers like this would be a great thing.

    Added: Fathers putting their foot down would help as well.

    “She seems to be recovering after watching her cell phone fly out the car window.”:5s:

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2016
  13. AD1

    AD1 Monkey+++

    This gives you an indication on how I did on my final Sate Real Estate Exam today

    image.
     
    Last edited: Sep 30, 2016
  14. AD1

    AD1 Monkey+++

    And speaking of Obama Care, I got this yesterday

    image.
     
  15. ghrit

    ghrit Bad company Administrator Founding Member

    Nope, no clue. Celebrating a win or drowning sorrows. Then again, rye is suitable for drowning and not for celebrating, when are you retaking the test?
     
    vegasrandall and AD1 like this.
  16. AD1

    AD1 Monkey+++

    Passed the state test. If I failed, it would have been MD 2020
     
  17. ghrit

    ghrit Bad company Administrator Founding Member

    Well done. Knew you could do it.
     
    chelloveck and AD1 like this.
  18. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    Congrats AD1!!!!!!!! [beer]
     
    chelloveck and AD1 like this.
  19. 3M-TA3

    3M-TA3 Cold Wet Monkey

    Congrats and good luck on the next test! When I get closer to evacuating Califoregon I will be in touch. Ideally will want something with a narrow mile long panhandle so I can put my MIL at its end.
     
    chelloveck and AD1 like this.
  20. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    [​IMG]
     
  1. Yard Dart
  2. Yard Dart
  3. Altoidfishfins
  4. Yard Dart
    [IMG]
    Thread by: Yard Dart, Oct 23, 2018, 23 replies, in forum: Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions
  5. 3M-TA3
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  7. Asia-Off-Grid
    [ATTACH]
    Thread by: Asia-Off-Grid, Jul 25, 2018, 10 replies, in forum: Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions
  8. chelloveck
  9. 3M-TA3
  10. Yard Dart
  11. OldDude49
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  13. Legion489
    [IMG]
    Thread by: Legion489, Jun 13, 2017, 8 replies, in forum: Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions
  14. Yard Dart
  15. Yard Dart
  16. chelloveck
  17. Yard Dart
  18. Ganado
  19. 3M-TA3
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