Scamming the Horny Panda: One trick that zookeepers have used to get male pandas interested in mating with dowdier females (according to a December dispatch from Sichuan, China, in Australia's The Age) is to let an attractive female roam around a pen, leaving her scent, and then, in darkness, with the male in the pen and frisky at the scent, to introduce the less attractive female into the pen, back-end first, so that the pre-excited male will quickly begin copulating. Said zookeeper Zhang Hemin, "When the males find out (that they've just mated with unintended partners), they get very angry and start fighting the female. We have had to use firecrackers and a water hose to separate them." [The Age (Melbourne), 12-17-06]
In my younger days, I may have woke up to find my barroom beauty from the night before not at all what I thought she was, but I didn't attack her, I just quietly snuck out the back.
Blackjack, that's why they coined the phrase 'Coyote Ugly'. You'd have to chew your arm off to get away. Haha. Remember one of the lines that SC posted is 'Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.' Haha.
They had to do that with my first wife on our honeymoon night, at least the part about the water hose and firecrackers
Maybe she ended up with my first husband....who resembled Sonny Bono at the time.... ( I can't believe I told y'all that!) But he played in a band...and knew all the words to "Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll" and "Talkin' WWIII Blues"....figured I had to marry him....
The Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll, Bob Dylan [FONT=Courier, Courier New]<!-- lyrics -->William Zanzinger killed poor Hattie Carroll With a cane that he twirled around his diamond ring finger At a Baltimore hotel society gath'rin'. And the cops were called in and his weapon took from him As they rode him in custody down to the station And booked William Zanzinger for first-degree murder. But you who philosophize disgrace and criticize all fears, Take the rag away from your face. Now ain't the time for your tears. William Zanzinger, who at twenty-four years Owns a tobacco farm of six hundred acres With rich wealthy parents who provide and protect him And high office relations in the politics of Maryland, Reacted to his deed with a shrug of his shoulders And swear words and sneering, and his tongue it was snarling, In a matter of minutes on bail was out walking. But you who philosophize disgrace and criticize all fears, Take the rag away from your face. Now ain't the time for your tears. Hattie Carroll was a maid of the kitchen. She was fifty-one years old and gave birth to ten children Who carried the dishes and took out the garbage And never sat once at the head of the table And didn't even talk to the people at the table Who just cleaned up all the food from the table And emptied the ashtrays on a whole other level, Got killed by a blow, lay slain by a cane That sailed through the air and came down through the room, Doomed and determined to destroy all the gentle. And she never done nothing to William Zanzinger. But you who philosophize disgrace and criticize all fears, Take the rag away from your face. Now ain't the time for your tears. In the courtroom of honor, the judge pounded his gavel To show that all's equal and that the courts are on the level And that the strings in the books ain't pulled and persuaded And that even the nobles get properly handled Once that the cops have chased after and caught 'em And that the ladder of law has no top and no bottom, Stared at the person who killed for no reason Who just happened to be feelin' that way without warnin'. And he spoke through his cloak, most deep and distinguished, And handed out strongly, for penalty and repentance, William Zanzinger with a six-month sentence. Oh, but you who philosophize disgrace and criticize all fears, Bury the rag deep in your face For now's the time for your tears. <!-- END lyrics --><!-- spacer --> [/FONT]
Yeah...well, it was 1970 something...what can I say? I wore some kind of cotton/muslin gown and sandals...to my wedding...on the beach. (at Sunrise, of course!) Ceremony performed by a Zen Buddhist....
Do you, Moonbeam, take this man as your significate other until such time as your contiousness expands and cosmic wonders lead you down different paths? And do you, Che, take this bride to share this moment in space with all other creatures, great and small? I now pronounce you
Don't do that when I have a mouthful of coffee EVER AGAIN.... Oh God, what a trip down Memory Lane..... and then we all held hands and sang Kumbaya....
Barely. Was composing it when yours popped up. Was trying to get the Haight-Ashbury flavor out of it --[rofllmao]
