Global warming is so... yesterday! THE GRAVITY CRISIS IS THE NEWEST CALAMITY TO BEFALL HUMANS! The newest crisis we can blame on the evil capitalists is: GRAVITY IS LESSENING! IT IS A FINITE RESOURCE! The evil corporations are extracting minerals at a record pace, therefore diminishing the Earth's mass. Remember--the more mass you have the more gravity you have. That is why the earth has more gravity than the moon... It is a double edge sword--we extract minerals from the earth and place them on the surface in form of roads, buildings...It takes gravity to hold them to the surface of "Mother Earth." So, now we expend more gravity than we generate. Gravity IS a FINITE resource! We will run out of gravity by the year 2026 at about the first week of September according to my Casio calculator. We need to make gravity credits the law! Al Goron is using too much gravity... This gives a whole new meaning to, "Earth ina Balance." He was a genius--just working on the wrong problem. But, Goron did make everyone aware of ultimate calamities to fall on the earth. I say when we plug him back into the ground--we have helped gravity--so fitting... If you weigh too much, you are expanding the need for gravity! God bless weight watchers! If the fish get too large, or too many, they are bad for gravity also--NFS opinions needed! NFS opinions are based on so much science, we need all of their opinions we can get--our lives depend on them! Remember--don't be a gravity hog --it is a finite resource! We must bury all of the heavy metals back into the Earth--this includes all your lead weights and any gold coins you have. You can help our group by joining: Friends Against Gravity Greed! I will provide an address to send your checks to further study this ultimate calamity!
Sounds like it is a good thing that everybody isn't on the Primal Journey. Some off us have to offset all the weight you guys are losing, to keep our planet in balance.
"We will run out of gravity by the year 2026 at about the first week of September according to my Casio calculator." I'm sure I inserted CASINO calculator when I read your text, it made so much more sense!!!!!
It's a good thing low information types don't usually come to the tree or you guys would've started riots by now.
Wait a Frigg'en Minute here..... This is the biggest Pile of steaming HorseDug, I have read all year...... The only difference in MASS that has changed, from when this Planet was first Formed, is that Mass we have shot out into Space, Period. The rest is still nicely compacted here on the surface of the Planet, or in the Atmosphere, in the case of some of the dust. I don't know who though this one up, but he doesn't have a Grasp of much in the way of Science, and needs to go back and ask for a REFUND, on his Education. Just think about the Premiss a bit. It just doesn't make ANY SENSE, or has a serious Breach of LOGIC. Oh Wait, it was a JOKE.... Right? Right over my Head.... Varoooom..... Nice Quig.....
